Why can’t it be simple?
By blog on Apr. 29, 2009.
My SO and I have been with each other for nearly nine years now. It’s been quite a while, and there are no intentions from either side of this partnership, of things coming to an end. And yet my mother finds this a difficult concept to grasp. Yes, she still doesn’t think we are ‘right’ for each other, or believe we will stay together, and still insists on talking up available women to me.
My mother is often meeting people, she is quite sociable, and she often tells me of what she has been up to, who she has been meeting, that sort of thing. As I have said, she lives in a retirement community, and there are all sorts of staff there. Nurses, activity coordinators, admin staff, etc. My mother will often tell me of how lovely this nurse is or this nurse is, over the phone, and I don’t say a thing. I don’t really care that they are nice past being appreciative that they are kind to my mother. Oh and if you said anything about this to my mother, she wouldn’t have a clue what you are talking about. It is such a subconscious thing that she doesn’t realise she is doing it. I have wondered if it is just me being odd in how I perceive her, but I have talked about this with other people and their reactions confirmed it… it’s really odd behavior.
Recently my SO and I went to visit her, and she started talking about one of the staff at the retirement community. She went on and on about this woman, about how nice she was, how she was available, how she was thinking she was going to end up a spinster. All the while, my SO and I are exchanging the most covert of looks to one another, her trying very hard not to crack up. She isn’t a fan of this behavior, but this was the first time it had so clearly been done right in front of her. Before this it was always over the phone, but it is an ongoing joke between us. To her credit, she managed to not laugh throughout my mother’s recommendation of this particular staff member.
So I ask myself, why can’t it be simple? Why can’t these two rational, friendly, caring human beings get along properly, rather than the pleasant but oddly tense relationship they currently have. I don’t know what it is about mother in law and daughter in law relationships, because these two used to be quite close… it seems to me that no one is immune from the curse that is this particular association!
Category: Technology