Planet Sillicon

Comic book villains: Part 3

By blog on May. 30, 2009.

Alright so now time for the final ten villains. Here’s hoping they are actually worthy of being in the top ten!

10: Kingpin. A big, fat, meh! Daredevil has always seemed crap to me, so I don’t really care about his villains. I have never really cared in the slightest about the ’stupidly wealthy, out to screw everyone, evil for no reason’ kind of villains. All they have is money, so they can pay people with actual super villain powers to do their dirty work!

9: Dark Phoenix. There’s no denying she is one scary evil doer, though I have always found that there isn’t any good – or bad – motivation for her. She just destroys stuff… because she feels like it… Well Miss Id-Kid, grow up!

8: Loki. He’s an interesting character in a way, the prankster who will ultimately bring an end to Asgard, but the comic book version is… less interesting to me. Why are there so many high-end villains working for other people?

7: Ra’s Al Ghul. Another interesting, and almost morally ambiguous character, except he is raving mad. I know he’s just after his idea of the perfect world, but even a moron can see that bringing down multiple civilisations isn’t going to get you real far, now is it, Mr Ghul!?

6: Darkseid… Boring! Seriously, I can’t stand the stupidly determined to wipe out all creation for no reason at all villains, they are stupid, pointless, and uninteresting to me.

5: Galactus. A world destroyer… because he is hungry… oh my, oh my that is so stupid. Seriously, I have no patience for this kind of inane super villain. I am pretty sure a group of ten year olds could come up with a villain with more depth than this guy.

4: Lex Luthor. Go back and read what I said for number 10, times my vehemence by 10, and you have what I think of ol’ Lex. Ugh, what a schmoozer, I have always hated this character, and not because he is some evil mastermind, no, because his history stinks and he lacks any kind of substance.

3: Doctor Doom. Maybe that group of ten year olds came up with this guy? I have always thought Doom sucked, stupid character, with a stupid name, with no real reason for being a bad guy, except ‘because’. Ugh!

2: Joker. Finally an interesting villain. Sure he’s nuttier than the packed lunch of your local squirrel, but he embraces that, and his role, and for the most part, a unique and interesting character emerges out of all that. I am absolutely happy to see him locked up, don’t get me wrong, but as villains go, it’s nice to see one that is actually villainous, not just rich.

1: Magneto. He’s an interesting one, his role as a villain is due to persecution of mutants, and yet he obviously takes that past the point of rationality, becoming that which he hates, a genocidal maniac.

So there’s the top ten. I have to say, it lacks luster, if you ask me. There are others that should have been up there.

Comic book villains: Part 2

By blog on May. 30, 2009.

First thing I want to say before I pick up again on my critique of comic book villains, is that the villains of Batman, kick the ass of the villains of Spider-Man. Seriously, the are nearly all so ridiculous! There are a few exceptions, but by and large, Gotham is a much scarier place.

Okay, on with the show. This guy, Thanos, looks like a thug, but is actually a pretty scary, psychotic fellow, and they are nearly never any good. I do enjoy when comic book villains are actually unique and creepy, I think it adds a more adult touch often missing from villains. At 46 we have Doomsday, who is the only creature to best Superman. I am glad that it didn’t turn out to be for good, because frankly, if Superman dies, then something in this world is wrong. I don’t care overly for Superman, I just like knowing he is out there in comic book land.

Another Batman villain makes it in at 45, Harley Quinn. I don’t know why, but there is something endearing about her in Batman: The Animated Series, she’s a nut-job, but one that loves her man. Awwwww.

Shredder made it in at number 39, and I have to say, I have never been impressed by the villain. He is more one of those villains that falls into the irritating category, rather than actually any real threat. 38 is a whole different story. Sentinel is one scary foe, these guys have always been creepy, for their lack of compassion and humanity, which is so clearly represented in their machine forms.

Number 34 is Bane. He who stopped The Batman, the original Batman, Bruce Wayne. I know there is a new Bat, and that Bruce couldn’t keep it up forever, but I really want this guy to receive some serious ass-whopping for breaking Bruce’s back!

I have to mention Bizarro at number 25 just because I like the The Bizarrow Jerry episode of Seinfeld. At 24 there is Apocalypse, and interesting character pulling a great many strings unseen in the X-Men world. You can really see this list start to ramp up now, with number 23, Ultron (silly name aside) being another scary foe. Venom is one of the few exceptions to my ruling about Spider-Man villains being unscary and crud, he’s a real nasty looking fellow.

Number 21, Ozymandias, actually has a very interesting, and morally ambiguous back-story, something very refreshing to see! 19 is Juggernaut, and I have to say, I always hated this guy, he is just an annoying git, really.

Brianiac, stupid name and all, is another of the Sentinal styled foes. The unfeeling, compassion lacking, machine-like villain. I find him really annoying too, actually. Number 13 proves that Spider-Man has the lamest villains, there is just something about the Green Goblin that screams crappy.

Before I leave off for part 3 – there really has to be three parts, you see, because the top ten deserve a good entry! – number 11 is Catwoman, and I am glad she made it up there. She really isn’t all that bad, too many times has she actually tried to help, but she has a certain style, as with most of the Batman villains, that is unmistakably her own.

Comic book villains: Part 1

By blog on May. 30, 2009.

I think all boys will at some point read comic books. It’s in the book of average little boy behavior. My main comics of choice were actually Asterix and Obelix, and Tintin, but I did read a little X-Men from time to time. Apart from that though, my comic book experience was rather limited, so when IGN brought out their list of the top 100 comic book villains, I had to take a look, even if I have never encountered the majority of these evil-doers in comic form as yet.

Some of the names are hilarious, I have to say. When you know nothing at all about something, and you hear the name for the first time, you can have this very unbiased opinion, which can often lead to outright belly laughs. For instance, at 100, there is MODOK… which is an acronym for ‘Mental Organism Designed Only for Killing’. That is laugh worthy. I mean sure, if you read a comic with this little fellow in it, you might think MODOK is a perfectly scary villain name, but if you haven’t, it’s entirely absurd. Annihilus fits into this category too, but more of a chagrined chuckle than full on laugh.

Numeber 91, The Adversary… who is Geppetto… from Pinocchio… That earns a full roar of laugh, with some bemusement too. Now 90, Carnage, he is one scary dude. That is a super villain! Then you have Mysterio… this dude needs to learn the importance of appropriate head ware. I mean really, who’s going to take you seriously with that bubble on your head!?

Saint of Killers has a rather jarring name, but actually has an interesting history. Something that many of these top 100 lack, in my humble opinion.

At 65 I’m afraid we have another entry into the silly helmet brigade, with Kang the Conqueror, but I suppose that isn’t quite as bad as The Leader, who has a silly – and somewhat repulsive – looking head… He’s worse off than Kang, because he can’t take it off.

Riddler came in at number 59, and I am happy to see him there. Whilst he isn’t the scariest chap around, he is nonetheless interesting and fun. Right after him is the oh-so-different but still from Gotham, Scarecrow, who I think is awesome in his freakishness. He is an interesting one, and his forays into Batman’s psyche are always interesting to ponder. Hobgoblin comes next, and he just isn’t scary. What are you going to do, Hobgoblin, put me in stripes next to spots? Hobgoblin’s alter ego is a fashion designer, you see, and whilst I could see a nasty remark about my outfit coming from him, there is little else to fear here.

Penguin got number 51, and I am proud of the little slime ball, in a way, I mean, how well do you think you’d do if you looked like a penguin, and not one of those cute ones. Lastly before I sign off on part 1 of my comic book villains expose, at 50 was Cassandra Nova who’s actually a pretty scary piece of work. Anyone that can best Professor Xavier is not someone I’d like to meet.